Tuesday, April 11, 2017

Goodbye Tour-It's ok to say goodbye to friends

I like many, apparently related so much to this week's ep. of Girls- Goodbye Tour. While yes, Lena Dunham in real life and Hannah her character on the show drive me insane, I can't help but tune in every week. I also this season have had several occasions where I have almost felt sorry for or related to Hannah. What is happening to me in 2017?

But like Hannah, Marnie, Shos, and Jessa I have been in their place more than one occasion recently in realizing that yes, people do find themselves in different situations where friends that you can't picture yourself not texting all day every day,  are not even speaking. It sucks at first, but it's reality and more importantly it's life. And everyone goes through it... ALL. THE. TIME.

At first I thought, is it me? Am I am terrible person like Lena Dunham? While yes, I am not perfect. And I have made mistakes. Trust me. I have faults and lots of them. I have realized, that sometimes it's the best situation to not be friends with someone and to work on being the best version of yourself. When you take time to step back and really examine your life, you see Wow. I am a shallow awful person. And the people I am surrounding myself with, do not help with that.

It can also be the other person. Life happens, we grow apart. We choose different paths in life. Some have kids, get married, while others may online shop a little too much. Not saying one path is better than the other... they are just different. And at times can be difficult to relate to or get on the same schedule. One may delete me from facebook and call me a fake individual. Which I may have deserved to a point, not entirely. My point is people change. For good or bad. Sometimes we understand the changes and other times, we can't grasp those changes for the life of us. And we can look at someone who we spent the last 5 years with and say, I don't even recognize you anymore. How can you have changed so much so fast?

Just like Shoshanna said "I have come to realize how exhausting and narcissistic and ultimately boring this whole dynamic is. And I finally feel brave enough to create some distance for myself."

When you finally realize it's time to distance yourself from certain situations, that's the moment you start growing. It will be painful. There will be tears and eating of your emotions. But out of it, will be clarity and moments where you finally start to see who you are. Will there be times where you fail? Yes. But you will have moments where new friendships will blossom and you can find healthy people who will support you and appreciate your quirky moments and obsessions. Yes I am talking about my deep love for the Real Housewives and other Bravo shows. (Judge all you want)

Throughout the past year a half, I have realized it's also important to truly be careful who you open up to. It's important to have your person to complain, to share your thoughts and dreams. But also not to completely take advantage of. Because while they are your person... you very well might not be theirs. And that's the hardest lesson to learn.

So yes. I am a terrible friend. I know this. But I can also be an amazing friend. I am a work in progress friend...

No comments:

Post a Comment